alright. now that i have some privacy, i can update! hoorah!

finished my last paper on sat 11am, let's say exams are alright, they're over, hurray!!! hope i do well. anyway, rushed home, did some last minute packing, left for airport, checked-in, met my cousin there, board the plane, an hour and a half approx flight to penang, touch-down, met the driver, reached hotel, checked in, see the room, left for uncle's house-warming party.

the new house is like, damn huge and grand lah! very very nice. there's a koi pond with vase-like thingies that have water spilling out from them into the pond. makes a nice and calming sound. there were plants all over. i love the bamboo shoots. there were palm trees too! and and and, his house overlooks the sea! hell, one can open the sidegate at the backyard and go down to the beach. and the beach is a nice, quiet area. i am so jealous. i want a house like that too! not as big though. the house is so huge, one has to kiai from one end of the hall to the other to be heard. it is 3 story high, and there's even a lift! yep, big and grand. sadly, it lacks the cosy, warm feeling of home.

anyway, for the housewarming, there was a buffet dinner complete with a band. yes, a band! and chefs cooking char kway teow, penang laksa, satays, ice-kachang etc etc etc! well, after eating the penang laksa, i ended up w a diarrhoea. -_-"

sunday: woke up early in the morning, went over to my uncle's house for my cousin's wedding tea ceremony. it was a rather noisy affair, with cameras flashing and all that jazz. great fun! esp since i get red packet. haha.

night. wedding dinner at the hotel lobby. 6.30p.m. was the cocktail reception, after which i left earlier with some other cousins to do the reception/ushering. reception was chaotic, cos there's usually no such thing for malaysia weddings. esp penang. people come late, people sit where they like. end of story. so, i was rather haggard by the end of it all, and those pesky adults (read: parents) hovering over our shoulders "helping us out" made matters messier. give us some credit can. we know what to do, lah. irritating. stop assuming you know what's going on when you weren't even present at the briefing.

anyway, we (as in helpers) couldnt enter the ballroom until the cake-cutting (cut-caking, wahaha~ jj peeps shd know what im talking abt) was over. so we slipped in just in time for the first course of dinner. didnt eat much, wasnt hungry. and i needed to lose weight anyway. (i skipped lunch earlier that day too... haa. no appetite. too busy le) made new friends! cousins from xiang's mother's side. hehe~ so we spent more time chatting then eating. i think those dishes were just a waste at our table. most of the time, the guys were gone cos they had to help out with the yam seng and photo-taking, and the 4 girls left couldnt eat much food. the only thing we managed to eat half of was the veges dish. haha. oh oh oh! wedding gift was a nice-scented candle! phwaaaaar! and i received hong bao agains for being a helper. tee-hee.

monday: swam. went jet-skiing and banana boating. banana boat damn painful can. bum hurt like hell from all that bouncing. the waves being humongous didnt help matters. one of my cousins actually bounced-off the boat/float. i was laughing and gripping the mini handle tightly. ended up w sore muscles the next day.

tuesday: swam. banana boat agains. but sea was calmer, so no fun. hah. checked-out. lunched - had penang laksa, char kway teow and all the wonderful penang food! yum yum! but i didnt eat much lah.

wednesday: travelled to ipoh after lunch. im here till fri. had ipoh's famous ya cai ji for dinner! yummies! having ipoh hor fun tmr. :D

and that's all, so far.

@@@

someone sms-ed me asking me to loan him/her (suspect is a her) 1k. crazy. like i have that much money. the person actually knows me personally, and was begging me and all. the thing is, i dont even have the person's number in my phone, so i have no idea who the hell that person is. and, since i dont have the contact, it means the person isn't a close friend of mine, nor is the person one who bothers to keep in contact with me. so, this person is "nicely" approaching me for help. how do i know i can trust this person?

the reason given was the person needs to save someone's life. what i want to know is, why the need for so much money to save this mysterious person's life? if it is some medical condition, im sure singapore has many funds or whatever available to help the poor. and, the sudden need to urgently borrow such a huge sum of money doesn't seem like that person is doing something legally, or at least, not in danger cos of a medical condition. so, if a person dug his own grave, why do i have to help? esp to someone who doesnt bother to keep in touch with me at all?

it really irks me whenever i receive an sms or a call from someone asking me to help, when that person does not bother to keep in touch with me at all. perhaps i should be glad that i have such a kind and helpful face, but really, i get fucking pissed when people only remember me when they are in dire need of help, and when i reject them, they smear my name. hello, if u really want my help, be nicer to me next time.

yet, some part of my conscience tells me i will blame myself if because of my suspicions and selfishness, i could cause the death of someone else. why oh why must such things occur to me?

@@@

i am fat. i know. you dont have to tell me that fact every single minute of the day. it isnt like i dont do any exercise, i do. hell, i dont even have the appetite to eat anymore since i came here cos of the looks i get. is it my fault if my body decides to expand horizontally no matter how much exercise i do? i guess it is.

i should stop eating, and just exercise 24/7. i should just trade places with a kid from africa. while my family will happily be feeding the poor kid with food, i shall starve myself over in africa. starve to death. then everyone will be happy.

it is so so so hard to not just succumb to the easy way out.